Who Knows Where This May Lead
by FreeSpirit21
Summary: After being taken from Alexandria, Emma tries to learn where she stands with her new leader. Rated M for language and future sexual content.
1. Chapter 1

I was walking down one of the long hallways toward the dining hall. Even in the month that I had been here, I still got confused with all of the long corridors and many doors. The Sanctuary was so different from Alexandria, but it felt safe here. Negan made it feel safe. He was strong and brave and knew what to do to protect his people. I hadn't talked to Negan much since I'd been here, always feeling intimidated whenever he came near me. I had seen what he had done to Abraham and Glenn. I knew that he was dangerous, but for some unknown reason, I felt safe.

As I sat at one of the tables with my tray of food, I kept my head down, trying to avoid eye contact with anyone. I glanced up and saw some people looking at one end of the large room, then continued eating my food, figuring that I should just mind my own business. A few seconds later, I felt a strong hand on my shoulder, causing me to nearly jump out of my seat. I was always so anxious, any little surprise caused me to jump. I turned my head to see a large hand clad in a black leather glove resting on my shoulder.

"Easy doll, nothin' to be afraid of," Negan's low, gravelly voice sent shivers down my spine.

When I didn't say anything, he gave me a smirk and then sat down next to me.

"You're Emma, right?" he asked, his dark green eyes piercing my light hazel.

"Yes." It came out in nearly a whisper.

I didn't know why Negan was suddenly starting up a conversation with me, so I sat in my seat, looking up at him, confusion across my face.

"How are you likin' the place? Pretty nice, huh?" His smirk never left his face.

I didn't answer him. This was the most he had talked to me since I had been here and his arrogance was starting to piss me off.

"It's alright," I said coolly before returning to my meal.

"Just alright? Sweetheart, you're lucky to be here. This place is way nicer than that shithole I took you from." His response set me off.

Even though I wasn't close with most of the members of the Alexandria group, I still felt that I had to defend them.

"That _shithole_ you _kidnapped_ me from was my home. And those people that you steal from every week, and the ones that you _murdered_ , were my friends. There is nothing nice about this place. It isn't a home, it's a prison." I grabbed my tray and walked away, not looking back to see the expression on Negan's face.

I had a feeling I was going to be in big trouble for what I had said, but at that point I didn't care. Negan needed to know how I felt. Nothing about the Sanctuary felt like a home. Yes, it felt safe, but I had never felt more like a prisoner.

A few hours later, I heard a knock on my bedroom door and before I could answer it, Negan was strolling into my room with Lucille over his shoulder. Every time I saw Lucille, I saw the images of Glenn and Abraham being beaten to death.

"Hey sweetheart, we need to talk," he said as he stood across from where I sat cross-legged on my bed.

"I'm sorry about what I said, please don't hurt me." I could already feel the tears welling up in my eyes.

"Hurt you? Dollface, that's the last thing I want to do," he answered, following my gaze to the weapon that had murdered two of my friends.

"You're not going to punish me?" I asked, trying to hold back the tears.

"Not with Lucille, but I could punish you in another way if you'd like," he smirked, then winked at me.

"I'd rather not have any punishment," I replied, having an idea of what type of punishment he was talking about.

"If you say so," he said with a chuckle.

"So… what did you come to talk to me about?" I asked hesitantly.

"I wanted to get to know you, Emma. You've been here for a month and I know nothing about you. So where are you from?"

"Well, I lived in Kansas before everything went to shit. I was visiting some friends in Atlanta when it started."

"Kansas, huh? That's where that adorable accent comes from," that damn smirk.

I turned my face away, trying to hide the blush that quickly covered my cheeks.

"What did you do before all of this shit?" he questioned.

"Well I had only been out of school for a couple months. I'm only 22. This isn't exactly how I imagined my 20's."

"You're only 20? That's rough. How'd you survive anything?" Negan seemed genuinely surprised.

"I know how to shoot, I can fight, and I'm good at staying hidden." His eyes got wide at my response.

"How well can you fight? Maybe you could be on my team."

"I don't know about that. Hiding has been my number one survival tactic. I don't do well under pressure."

My gaze dropped to the floor, embarrassed about my secret. Negan just seemed more interested in what I was talking about.

"Tell me more," he pushed.

"It's hard to explain. Let's just say that you don't want me anywhere near a herd of walkers if I'm expected to help fight them."

Negan raised his eyebrow, but didn't push any further. We continued talking in my room for what seemed like hours. By the time he got up to leave, the sun had set and it was pitch black outside. He stopped at the door and turned to me.

"Sweet dreams, doll. I'll see you tomorrow."

When my door latched, I laid back on my bed and allowed my mind to race.

 _What are you thinking? Are you seriously attracted to this guy? No, he's just nice to talk to. He also murdered two of your friends. Yes I know that but I have to be nice. Nice doesn't mean you have to jump on his dick. We were just talking, nothing more. That's what you said about the last guy and he broke your heart after he got in your pants._

When my mind finally calmed down, I was able to drift off into a not-so-peaceful sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning, I woke up to a knock on my door. I heard the door open and knew without looking that it was Negan. Nobody else would barge in like that. I lazily sat up and rubbed the sleep from my eyes before looking up at the grin on his handsome face.

"Mornin', doll. How'd you sleep?" he asked.

"Pretty well. What time is it?" I replied through a yawn.

"7. Get up and get dressed. I want you to come with me." When he finished telling me what to do, he just stood by the door looking at me.

I could tell that he wasn't going to leave. I rolled my eyes when he smirked, then threw the blanket off of me. I walked to the drawers that held my clothes, knowing very well that he was watching my every move. I always slept in a t-shirt and underwear. I was comfortable with my body, I was fairly fit and had a small figure. Negan wasn't the first man to see me half-naked so I just ignored the feeling of his eyes on me. I bent down to pick up a clean outfit for the day and heard him inhale a sharp breath.

"Holy _fuck_ , sweetheart. The things I would do to you. You're killin' me." I knew my body was alright, but it had never caused that reaction from any other man I had been with.

I didn't say anything to him. I smirked to myself as I lifted my t-shirt over my head, revealing my bare back to Negan. _What are you doing? This man is the enemy! And he's old enough to be your father! But he seems interested. And it's the end of the world. Age doesn't matter anymore._ I was pulled from my thoughts by a warm breath on my neck.

"Emma, it's not nice to tease." The feeling of his breath sent chills throughout my body.

"I'm not teasing, I'm just getting dressed like you asked. And besides, I would never try to hit on a married man." Without looking at him, I finished dressing and went into the bathroom to get ready.

I had been lucky enough to receive a room with a bathroom. I knew that not all rooms had them, which made me grateful. _Maybe he likes me. No he doesn't, he just wants in your pants. I'd gladly let him in. What am I saying? Calm down and focus._ After I was ready to start the day, I walked out of the bathroom to see that Negan was now sitting on the edge of my bed. I tried to turn my thoughts away from what he would look like naked, sprawled across my bed.

"So what are we doing today?" I asked, trying to sound calm and cool.

"Training," he said after a few moments of looking me up and down.

His eyes were intense as he stared at me, waiting for an answer. I was confused by what he meant. I had already told him that he didn't want me on his team.

"Training?" I questioned skeptically.

"Yep. You said you can fight. I wanna know how well."

"Oh… alright," I sighed, trying to calm my shaking hands.

Negan stood from my bed and took my hand to lead me to the place where I would begin training. I couldn't help but enjoy the way my hand felt in his. It felt safe and secure, but also frightening. I tried to focus on what needed to be done today, but all I could think about was the way Negan walked, the way he smelled, and the way that I wanted to drag him into my bed.

"Alright, here we are, dollface." I looked away from him to see that we were in some sort of open yard surrounded by the buildings of the Sanctuary.

There were others gathered in the area, probably there for training like I was. Negan let go of my hand and walked to the center of the group, getting everyone's attention.

"Listen up, you fucks. We're going to be seeing how well you pricks can fight, and then I'll decide who will be on one of our teams. Everybody fuckin' got it?"

In one voice, the others all shouted, "yes, Negan!" I looked around. Everyone was focused on what Negan was saying, with serious looks on their faces. I didn't want to fight anyone. I had been fighting walkers for so long, I wasn't sure if I would be able to fight well enough now to show Negan what he wanted.

When Negan called for me, I knew it was my turn. There were only three girls in the group, including me. Negan had me fight against one of the other girls. She was taller than me by a few inches and her body was bigger than mine. I stood in the middle of the open lot waiting for her to attack. When she lunged, I spun to the side, skillfully dodging her. We continued fighting for several minutes and I was able to dodge all of her attempted attacks. When I could tell that she was tired, I took my chance and swiped her legs out from under her with a well-placed kick. She landed on her back with a thud and I felt a swell of pride when I saw that Negan was smiling at me. An actual smile, not his arrogant smirk that I always saw.

"Nice job, Emma. I have a feeling you were good at dodgeball when you were in school." He winked at me and I just smiled and blushed.

I continued to watch the rest of the group show off their skills, or their lack of. We were out there for a few hours and by the time we were finished, it was time for lunch. Negan released us to go eat and when I turned to leave I felt his hand on my shoulder. I looked up at him and saw his smirk had returned.

"Come eat lunch in my room. I want to discuss some things."

"Okay, where's your room?" He chuckled at my question, but I wasn't sure what was so funny.

"Just follow me, sweetheart. I'll have someone bring up some food for us."

I followed Negan up several flights of stairs until we came to the end of a long hallway. He opened up the door and I was pretty sure my jaw dropped. His room was huge. He had clearly gotten the master suite of the whole place. He had a king size bed with silky sheets, couches and chairs, anything you could need. My eyes kept going to his bed. It looked so inviting.

"You wanna get in my bed? Usually I'm the one to push for that," he said with a wink.

I felt a blush come over my cheeks as I stumbled over my words.

"No, it's just, it looks really comfortable. I've uh, I've always wanted a big bed like that," I mentally slapped my forehead.

I had never felt like such an idiot. I don't know why he intimidated me so much. He knew he was attractive. I'm sure every girl here wanted him. There was no way that he could like me. I wasn't going to just jump in bed with a man that I barely knew. I had been down that road and I didn't want to go through that pain again. Negan led me to one of his couches and we sat down.

"I want you to come on a run with me and my team. You can fight and I need someone like you. Nobody on my team has the skills that you do. What do you say?"

I was surprised, but also relieved. If I was going with him to one of the communities, I wouldn't have to fight the walkers. People have weapons, but they won't tear me apart. I could handle that.

"Alright, I'll go. Where are we going?"

He looked at me for a moment before answering. "Alexandria."


	3. Chapter 3

My eyes widened when I heard the name. I had been gone for a month. What would they think when they saw me with Negan, helping him? They would feel betrayed and hurt. What if they hurt Negan? _Why does it matter? He's not your boyfriend or anything._ I took a deep breath to calm my thoughts. I would go. I would show them that I'm alright. And then I would leave them again.

"Okay. When are we leaving and what do I have to do?"

"Tomorrow morning. You just have to stand there and look pretty. If shit goes south, that's when I'll need you to do your ninja thing."

I rolled my eyes and smiled at his answer to my question. I knew this would be tough but I had to do it. I was one of the saviors now.

"I'll be ready," I said with a nod.

After I said that, there was a knock at the door. Negan looked at me and smiled.

"Food's finally fuckin' here. Come the fuck in," he shouted.

A man that I didn't recognize brought in a tray with two plates of food. He set the tray down before hurrying out of the room. Negan stood up and walked to his refrigerator. He tossed me a cold bottle of water before opening a beer bottle for himself.

"You're done for the day. You need to rest for your first run tomorrow. After you eat, you can go back to your room and fuckin' relax or whatever the hell you want to do."

I looked at him and nodded before taking a big gulp of the refreshing water. I ate my food quickly, ready to be out of Negan's room and away from all of the temptations it held for me. When I was finished with my food, I stood to leave.

"Leavin' so soon? I thought you wanted to try out the big bed. It's even better than it looks," he winked.

"Like you said, I need to go relax. It'll be a long day tomorrow," I couldn't tell him that I was leaving because if I stayed any longer, I would most likely end up in his bed.

I knew I would hate myself if I let that happen. All Negan wanted from me was sex, and once he got it, I would mean nothing. So I walked toward the door, trying to avoid looking at the big bed one last time. Before I left, Negan stopped me.

"Hey Emma, come have dinner with me tonight. I'll come get you from your room."

It wasn't a question, so I couldn't turn him down. I nodded and smiled, then left his room. I kept getting a feeling that maybe there was something more. I couldn't believe it though. I had only just started having conversations with him the night before and I had already been here a month. Surely he would have approached me sooner if he had any feelings for me at all. I let my mind continue to go through ideas and reasons as I continued toward my room.

Walking through the seemingly endless hallways was still difficult. I thought I knew where I was, but then I ended up completely lost. I tried retracing my steps, hoping to maybe make it back to Negan's room so he could give me directions. _Or fuck my brains out._ I pushed the thought down. I needed to go back to my room. Trying to figure out where I was, I bumped into a man that had just walked out of one of the many rooms. He looked familiar and I recognized him from Negan's team. I began to apologize, but before I could get any words out, I felt a hand slap across my cheek. I grabbed my face and was about to protest before I was tackled to the floor.

"Get off of me! Stop! Somebody help me!" I screamed until no more words would come out.

When I was about to stop fighting, I felt the man's weight lift off of me. I looked up in time to see Negan beating the shit out of the man. When he was finished, the man was unconscious, or dead, on the floor. He turned to me and I could see the fear and worry in his eyes. I tried to speak, to thank him for saving me, but when he bent down to pick me up, everything went black.

I woke up in a big bed with silky sheets and instantly knew where I was. I looked around and found Negan asleep next to me in a white t-shirt and boxers. He must have felt my slight movements because he stirred next to me. He sat up sleepily and looked at me.

"Hey darlin', glad to see you're awake." He still had worry in his face.

I wasn't sure why he was so worried. It didn't make any sense to me. I looked out the window to see that it was dark outside. I didn't know how long I had been out, it had only been 1 or 2 when I had left Negan's room earlier that day.

"How long have I been out?"

He looked at the clock on his wall.

"About 8 hours. You scared the shit out of me." I looked down sheepishly, feeling embarrassed about what had happened.

He lifted my face up to look at him.

"Hey. That wasn't your fault. That fucker that did that to you, he's gone. You don't have to worry about that anymore, alright? You're safe here." He leaned forward and kissed the top of my head.

Negan leaned back against his pillow, his eyes never leaving me. I gathered up my courage and tried to form the words in my head before I spoke them, trying not to embarrass myself too much.

"Negan, what is this?"

He looked confused by my question so I took a deep breath and began to explain what I meant.

"What do you want with me? Sex? Because I can't just have sex with you. I don't want to get hurt by meaningless sex. I know you have a bunch of other girls that will have sex with you, so I don't know why you want me."

"Emma, it's not about the sex. There's something about you that draws me to you. I want to protect you. I haven't felt like this with anyone since my wife. Lucille."

A million questions were racing through my mind. Negan was married before? He named his bat after his wife. A lot of things were starting to make sense now.

"You were married? What happened to her?"

I was curious. I wanted to know about his wife and why I made him feel this way.

"Yeah I was married before everything started. Cancer fuckin' killed her. I was a shitty husband, cheated on her. I hated myself for it. But when I look at you, I feel the way I did with her."

I just stared at Negan, not sure of what to say. I didn't want to say anything wrong or make him angry. He didn't say anything else right away, he just looked at my face, trying to read my expression.

"I'm sorry about your wife. But if you feel this way about me, then what about the… others? You have, like, five other women waiting for you." I looked down, feeling slightly disappointed.

"Emma, they haven't been here since you came to live at the Sanctuary. I sent them away. Most of them went back to be with boyfriends or husbands or whatever. I knew that I wanted you."

He reached his hand up to gently stroke my cheek. There was a bruise forming from my attacker's palm. I placed my hand over his and closed my eyes.

"So what does this mean?" I asked, my eyes still shut.

"It means that I want you. Only you."

Negan leaned forward and captured my lips in his own. I immediately returned the kiss, allowing his searching tongue access to my mouth. He rolled us so that his body was hovering over mine as he continued the kiss. With quick fingers he lifted my t-shirt, only breaking the kiss to pull the shirt over my head. He had apparently removed my jeans before putting me in bed, so the only things between us were his shirt, boxers, and my panties. Negan quickly removed every article of clothing between us and started to trail kisses down my body.

"You are so beautiful," he said after pausing to look at me.

He leaned down to take one of my nipples in his mouth while palming my other breast with his hand. I could feel his tongue flicking at the hard bud. With every movement, my hips sought some sort of friction to relieve the tension between my legs. Feeling my movements, Negan slipped his hand between us and began massaging my sensitive bundle of nerves while switching his mouth to my other nipple. After a few moments, he slid a finger inside and I sucked in a small gasp.

"Oh Negan," I breathed, nearing my climax already.

"That's it, sweetheart. Come for me," he whispered in my ear, his voice low and rough.

At his words, I came apart. I tried to hold in a scream but the way he worked my body felt too good to control. After a few minutes, I was down from my climax. I felt soft kisses being placed on my neck and without looking at Negan, I reached down and began stroking his large erection. He inhaled a sharp breath and looked me in the eyes. While still making eye contact, he lined himself up with my entrance.

"I want to make you scream my name," he whispered as he slid his hardness into me, making me gasp at how thick he was.

After a few seconds, I began to rock my hips, feeling every inch of him inside me. When we were both nearing our orgasm, he leaned down and sucked my earlobe into his mouth, nipping gently.

" _Fuck_ , Negan!" I screamed as we came together.

He pulled out and finished himself onto my stomach before rolling onto his side next to me. We lay there for several minutes, trying to catch our breath. When his breathing had evened out, Negan got up and went into his bathroom. He returned a minute later with a wet rag and began cleaning the mess off of my stomach. When we were both clean, he laid back down next to me, wrapping his arm around me and pulling me closer. Before I drifted off to sleep, I felt him kiss my head before whispering softly in my ear.

"Sweet dreams, darlin'."


	4. Chapter 4

The morning sun's rays shining into the room brought me out of my sleep. I rubbed my eyes and smiled, feeling Negan's strong arm across my stomach. I stood from the bed, trying to be as quiet as possible, not wanting to wake him from his peaceful sleep. I walked into the bathroom and started the shower, wanting to get a head start on the day. When I finished my shower I wrapped a soft towel around my body and realized that I didn't have any clean clothes to put on. Holding the towel securely around me, I walked out of the bathroom.

"Mornin', sweetheart," Negan said in a low, sleepy voice.

His hair was a mess from last night's activities, making me smile. He smiled at me and patted the empty space next to him on the bed. Walking over to him, I let the towel fall to the floor. Negan wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me down next to him, placing a kiss on my lips.

"Why are you getting all cleaned up?" he asked curiously.

"I wanted to be ready for when we go to Alexandria," I informed him.

The look on his face was one of surprise. He had been the one to ask me to go to Alexandria, but now he looked almost disappointed that I was still planning on going.

"I think it'd be a good idea if you stayed here. I want you safe, and after that little scare we had yesterday I don't know if it's a good idea for you to go."

His response warmed my heart and disappointed me at the same time. I was flattered that he wanted to keep me as safe as possible, but I also wanted to go with him. I was embarrassed that he thought I couldn't take care of myself. Of course being attacked would cause a reaction like that, but not going with Negan to the place that I used to call home.

"I can handle it. I'll wait in the truck if it makes you feel better, but I really want to go with you," I gave my best puppy dog eyes, trying to convince him to let me tag along.

He sighed, "alright, but only because that face is too damn cute to say no to."

I smiled, wrapping my arms around his neck and making a point of pressing my breasts against is bare chest. It didn't take long before he had flipped me onto my back, his fingers in my hair and his lips against mine. When he was about to slip his erection inside me, Negan was stopped by a hard knock at his door.

"Who the fuck is it?" he shouted.

"Simon, sir. The team is ready to head out."

" _Fuck_ ," he mumbled to himself, "what time is it?"

"Almost 9."

"I'll be right down, give me a fuckin' minute."

Negan looked into my disappointed eyes and gave me one more kiss before climbing off of the bed. I looked down at where my clothes from the previous night were scattered. Negan's gaze followed mine and I saw a smirk return to his face.

"You can borrow some of my clothes, doll. They won't fit too well, but you'll still look fuckin' good," he said with a wink.

"Thanks. I was hoping I wouldn't have to wear that again."

I crawled to the edge of the bed and pulled him down to face me. He placed his hands on my face and kissed my forehead.

"Thank you for everything," I said sincerely.

"Anything for you, Emma."

I sat on the bed waiting for Negan to find some clothes that would work for the day's task. After he was dressed, he handed me a black t-shirt and a pair of gray sweatpants. The clothes were baggy, but I didn't mind. They smelled like Negan and they were warm. When we were both ready to go, he grabbed my hand and Lucille and led me down to where the team was waiting.

He helped me step up into the huge truck that was waiting for us. He practically had to lift me up into it as my legs weren't long enough to easily step into it. When I was in the seat, he walked around and climbed into the driver's seat and grabbed my hand.

We were on the road for a while. I had fallen asleep against the door and when we finally got to Alexandria, Negan gave my hand a squeeze. I looked up to see that the gate was open and all of the people that lived there were inside waiting for us. I suddenly felt a knot in my stomach, worried about what they all would think or say when they saw me with Negan. Not that I should care, I was with him now. He cared about me and made me feel important. Negan stopped the truck once we were inside the walls of the community and turned off the engine.

"Wait here, I'll come around and get you."

I just nodded in acknowledgement. I wasn't sure if I would be able to find my voice at the moment and I didn't want to test it. Negan came around to my side and opened my door. He wrapped his arms around my waist and lifted me from the truck. When my feet were on the ground, he reached into the truck and grabbed Lucille. After shutting the door, he grabbed my hand and laced his fingers through mine. I looked up at him and smiled before he planted a soft kiss on my temple. I looked up to see my old friends, all with looks of either shock, disgust, or anger on their faces. I immediately dropped my gaze to the ground, feeling like a traitor.

"Rick, I've missed ya," Negan said with a laugh.

"What are you doing with her? Why did you bring her here?" Rick asked accusingly.

"Easy, Rick. She wanted to come with me. No big deal."

Rick glared at Negan and then at me. The look on his face made me feel like I was going to throw up. I was kicking myself for not staying in the truck like I had told Negan I would. It would have made things much easier for everyone. It was like any normal visit. The saviors took the stuff they wanted and loaded it in the trucks. When we were about to get into the trucks to leave, I heard a scoff from one of the Alexandrians. I turned to see that it was Rosita. Of course. She was always the one to start problems. She walked up to me with a look of disgust and hatred on her face. I took a step back when she approached me, not knowing what she intended to do. I was backed up against the truck when she reached me.

"Are you serious? After everything this asshole has done, you're on his side now?" she yelled at me, waving her hands in my face.

I didn't say anything, I just looked at Negan, fear in my eyes. He took a step toward me to intervene, but he was too slow. I looked back at Rosita and just barely saw the glint of her knife before she swung.

"You traitorous coward! You don't deserve to live!"

I tried to dodge her swing but I was too close to the truck to move. Her knife sliced across my chest and down to my abdomen. I saw one of Negan's men tackle Rosita and saw Negan running to me to catch my fall. He almost made it, but I felt my head smack against the street. I winced at the impact and looked down at the cut, trying to stop the bleeding with my hands. It didn't do any good. Negan had his shirt off in an instant, pressing it against my wound to control the blood flow. He put one shaky hand on my cheek.

"Hang on, Emma. Don't you let go. You're gonna be alright."

He kept repeating those words. I tried doing as he said but soon my vision started to go black. Before I lost consciousness, I heard a gunshot.


	5. Chapter 5

I was in and out of consciousness as Negan rushed me back to the Sanctuary. I was laying across the front seat, my head in his lap while he drove. One of his hands was on the steering wheel, the other keeping pressure on my wound. I feebly reached for his hand with my own, wanting to let him know that I was alright. I slowly opened my eyes to look up and see that he was looking at me, his eyes filled with concern.

"I'm… I'm gonna be okay," I said, trying to raise my voice above a whisper with no luck.

"Easy, baby. I'm gonna take good fuckin' care of you. Don't you worry."

I weakly turned my head to place a kiss on his bare stomach, his shirt still being pressed against me and soaked in my blood. I knew he would take care of me so I tried not to worry. I smiled up at him before losing consciousness again.

When I woke up, we were at the Sanctuary and I was being carried to the infirmary. I saw that Negan's shirt had been replaced by a clean towel. He must have let someone know that we would be coming. Blood was slowly seeping through the towel, but it was not as bad as it had been. We arrived at the infirmary and Negan laid me down on the table. When he stepped away, I reached for his hand. He quickly laced his fingers with mine, squeezing them gently. He held my hand while the doctor cleaned and began stitching my wound. The needle threading through my skin was extremely painful since there was no numbing medication to give me first. I winced and several tears rolled down my cheek.

"What's wrong, doll?" Negan asked, wiping my tears away with his thumb.

"It hurts," I whimpered, feeling like a baby.

I hated feeling weak, but after almost bleeding to death I wasn't sure how else I was supposed to feel. My skin was pale, my body was shaky, and my head was dizzy. I tried focusing on Negan's face instead of the pain but my vision was blurry. He continued to rub his thumb across my cheek, trying to calm me down. I tried to bring my hand to his, but I couldn't lift it. My body was too weak. Suddenly, my body went stiff and then started convulsing. I could still see and hear, but I couldn't control anything and I couldn't make any words come out of my mouth. The only noise that would escape my lips was a choking sound. I felt like I couldn't breathe.

"Emma! Doc, what the _fuck_ is going on?!" I heard Negan yell.

"Don't restrain her, turn her on her side," the doctor said calmly.

"Baby, can you hear me?" Negan said, bending so he was eye level with me.

I stared into his eyes and managed to nod my head once. He started rubbing my arm as the convulsions began subsiding. When my body finally went limp, he rolled me onto my back.

"What the hell was that?" he asked, confused and worried.

"It happens sometimes," I said in a raspy voice.

He gave me a look that said he wanted to know more. I took a deep breath and tried to clear my throat. It was now sore from gasping for air for several minutes.

"Can we talk about it in private?" I asked, glancing awkwardly at the doctor.

"Sure thing, doll. Is she okay to go, doc?"

"As long as she feels comfortable. Make sure she gets rest, food, and water. She needs to make sure to regain her energy."

Negan nodded at the doctor and gently picked me up in his strong arms and carried me up to his room. When we got to his room, he carefully laid me on his bed and grabbed a cold bottle of water out of his refrigerator.

"I'll radio for someone to bring us up some food," he said to me as he pulled out his radio.

He was talking to Dwight. I listened to what he was saying as I slowly drank the cool water. When he had given Dwight the orders, he walked over and sat next to me on the bed. He put his arm around my shoulders and kissed my forehead. I was dreading what was coming next. I knew he would want an explanation of what had happened in the infirmary.

"So doll, wanna let me know what happened back there?"

I nodded slowly, staring at my hands as the played with the silky sheet.

"Sometimes, when my body is under too much stress, it kind of just shuts down. That's why I didn't want to be a part of your team. I didn't want to be a liability when it came to facing a herd of walkers."

"That would've been fuckin' nice to know, doll," he said.

"Yeah, I know. But it's embarrassing. That's why I never really said anything."

I could feel his eyes on me, but I continued staring at the bed. I was embarrassed that he had seen me in that state. It was always awkward when it happened during school, but now with Negan I wanted to go hide under a rock. He turned my face to look at him, a soft smile on his lips.

"There's nothing to be embarrassed about. Yeah, it was scary as hell. But seeing anyone you love going through that would be scary."

My eyes went wide when I realized what he said. I stared at him with my mouth gaping slightly before I could think of the right words to say.

"Anyone you love? But…"

"I know what I said, baby. I know it's fast, but why let anything slip away in this shitty ass world."

"Does that mean…"

"Yes. I love you, Emma. Every part of you, even the parts that you find embarrassing."

He grabbed my face gently and pressed his lips to mine, kissing me slowly and passionately. He pulled away after a moment and looked at me.

"I love you too, Negan."

He smiled and kissed my forehead, before looking down at my outfit. I followed his gaze and grimaced when I saw all of the blood on his gray sweatpants and the tear in his shirt.

"Sorry about your clothes," I mumbled.

"It's not your fault," he said, "and besides, I have plenty of clothes that you can wear," he smirked.

"Would you mind getting me different clothes to wear?" I asked sheepishly.

He nodded at me, kissed my head, and then stood to get a new shirt and pants for me. He returned with another pair of gray sweatpants and a darker gray hooded jacket. He set the new clothes on the bed in front of me before helping me take off the blood-stained clothes I still had on. I raised my arms above my head, trying not to pull on the stitches that ran down my chest and abdomen. He removed the shirt carefully then slid the pants down my legs, dropping them on the floor. Negan looked at my body, covered in blood, and gave me a look.

"Come take a bath with me."

"But I can't get the stitches wet yet."

"I won't fill it very full, but I want to clean you up," he said with a smile.

He helped me stand from the bed and walked with me to the bathroom. I sat on the edge of the tub while Negan ran the water and waited for the bathtub to partially fill. When he was satisfied with the water, he removed his clothes and helped me into the tub with him. He reached for a wet rag on the side of the tub and gently began cleaning the blood from around my injury. Before long, the bath water was tinted red with my blood and Negan pulled the plug from the drain. When I was clean, he helped me out of the bath and wrapped a towel around me, careful not to rub the stitches. Negan dried me with the towel and then dried himself.

We went back to the bed and he helped wrap my stitches with gauze that the doctor had given him before we left. When the wound was covered, Negan helped me dress before laying in the bed next to me. Just before I fell asleep, I heard a knock on the bedroom door. Negan groaned beside me then stood up to go see who was knocking.

"What the fuck do you want?"

It was Dwight with a tray of food that Negan had asked for earlier.

"Holy shit. It took you so fuckin' long that I forgot I even asked for any damn food."

"Sorry, sir."

Negan took the food from Dwight and closed the door. I sat up in the bed, wincing when the stitches pulled slightly. He sat the tray down in front of me and took his place next to me. We ate in silence. When we were finished, I took my bottle of water off the bedside table and finished it. Negan chuckled as I downed the rest of the water before standing to grab another bottle from the fridge. He handed it to me and I quickly removed the cap and took a big gulp, letting it soothe my still sore throat.

"Easy, doll," he said with a laugh.

"Sorry," I blushed, "I'm really thirsty."

"Yeah, I bet. Just don't make your stomach hurt."

Negan set the empty tray on the floor by the door and returned to bed. He laid down beside me, draping his arm across my lower abdomen. Before we drifted off, he whispered softly in my ear.

"Goodnight, baby. I love you."

"Goodnight, Negan. I love you too."


	6. Chapter 6

A few weeks after the attack at Alexandria, my injury had healed fairly well. My stitches had been taken out and the cut was starting to scar. I was in line for dinner when I felt a hand grab my wrist. Frightened, I turned to see who it was, hoping it was Negan. When I saw that it was a random man, I started to get concerned.

"Excuse me," I started but he wouldn't let me finish.

"Why do you get to eat? What have you done here? You don't work or do anything to pull your own weight. So what gives you the right?"

I stared at the man in shock. He was right. I hadn't done anything here to help out or deserve anything. I spent most of my time in Negan's room. I dropped my eyes to the floor when he didn't say anything. After a few seconds, I left the dinner line and made my way back up to Negan's room. About an hour later, Negan came up to the room carrying Lucille over his shoulder. He set his bat against the wall and walked over to the couch I was sitting on and took his place next to me.

"How was your day, doll?" he asked before kissing me.

"It was fine," I replied, not making eye contact.

"That's a bullshit answer. Did something fuckin' happen?"

"No. Well, kinda. I didn't get to eat dinner," I told him, looking up to see that he looked irritated.

"And why the fuck not, sweetheart?"

"Some guy came and grabbed me and said I had no business eating the food that they had all worked hard for. He was right. Y'all do so much around here and I haven't done anything to contribute," I dropped my eyes to the floor again.

He moved closer to me, putting his arm around my shoulders and kissing my temple. I turned my head to face him, wanting to know what he was thinking.

"First of all, fuck that guy. He has no business telling anybody around here what they can and can't do. Don't listen to any of these shitheads. If I say you eat, you eat. Got it?"

I nodded, smiling. Negan always knew how to make any shitty situation better. I leaned forward, resting my head against his chest.

"And second of all, I love how thick your accent gets when you're upset. It's adorable."

He kissed the top of my head and laughed, rubbing my shoulder. His comment made blood rush to my cheeks. I tilted my head to plant a kiss on Negan's cheek before leaning back against his chest.

"Don't worry about anything, honey. I'm taking care of you. I won't let anything happen to you."

"I know," I smiled at him, "I just feel bad for not pullin' my weight around here."

"You let me worry about that, baby," he said before lifting my face up so he could kiss me.

I leaned into the kiss, bringing my hand to rest on his jaw, gently caressing his salt and pepper beard. Negan deepened the kiss, leaning us back into the couch. Before long we were both naked, our hands exploring each other's bodies. Negan pulled back from the kiss and when I opened my eyes, I saw him bring his hand up to run his fingertips along the length of my scar. I put my hand under his chin, bringing his face up to look me in the eyes.

"I love you," I whispered.

"I love you too, sweetheart."

Negan brought his lips against mine gently, running his tongue against my bottom lip. I parted my lips to give him the access he desired. Trailing my fingers down his stomach, I smiled against his lips as I felt his large erection. I rubbed my palm against his bulge, feeling satisfaction as he moaned into my mouth. As I continued to palm his erection, I pulled my mouth away from his, moving to where his neck and shoulder met, running my tongue along his collarbone.

"Fuck, Emma," he growled.

In a swift motion, Negan was sitting upright on the couch and I was on his lap. He lifted me up and positioned himself beneath me. I lowered myself gently onto his erection, gasping at the feeling of him inside me. I began to move slowly, my head falling back as Negan found my nipple with his mouth while his other hand moved down my back and grabbed my ass. After a few minutes, Negan stood up and carried me to the bed. He gently laid me down and began thrusting inside of me.

"God, Negan…" I moaned, almost begging.

Negan moved his hand between us and began rubbing the swollen bundle of nerves near where we were connected. I pulled on his lower lip with my teeth and when I moaned his name once more, feeling my climax nearing, it brought him to the brink. He thrusted one more time and then stilled inside of me as we came together. When we both came down from our high, he rolled to his side and pulled me against him.

"I love you," he said, his eyes shut and a content smile on his face.

"I love you too, Negan," I whispered before letting sleep take over my body.

I wasn't sure how long I had been asleep, but when I woke up to a pounding on the door, I sat up right away and immediately looked to see Negan still asleep beside me. I nudged him awake and then heard another loud knock on the door.

"What the fuck," Negan groaned, still groggy from being awoken suddenly.

He put a pair of sweatpants on and walked to the door. When he pulled it open, Simon was standing there with a concerned look on his face. I made sure I was covered with the sheet but I remained sitting so I could focus on what was going on.

"What the fuck is it, Simon?" Negan almost shouted.

"Negan, Rick's people are planning something. Some of our men have spotted them with guns. Lots of guns."

"Well I guess we'll just have to go shut that shit down then, won't we?" Negan looked at Simon with a smirk.

"Yes sir. When do you want to leave?"

"What time is it now?" Negan asked.

"About 11:30."

Negan glanced out the window and saw that it was completely black outside.

"We leave at midnight. Tell the others."

Simon nodded and then went down the hallway. Negan shut the door and returned to the bed.

"What are you going to do?" I asked, concerned.

"Find out what the fuck is going on with ol' Rick. I'll be back before you know it, doll."

"I'm coming with you. Give me a gun," I said in a serious voice, letting Negan know that I meant business.

"Fuck, doll. You nearly died last time. You honestly think I'm going to let you go with us?"

"Yes I do. I want to show those assholes whose team I'm on. I'm not backing down that easily. If you fight, so do I."

When Negan didn't say anything, I stood up from the bed and walked to the closet where he kept his clothes. I grabbed a pair of black sweatpants and one of his white t-shirts. I put on my shoes and then looked up to see Negan getting dressed as well. When we were ready to leave, we walked down the hall to where the rest of the group was waiting. We got to the trucks and before I climbed into the passenger seat, Negan grabbed my hand. I looked at him and smiled but when I saw that he had a serious look on his face, I glanced down at the gun he was holding out for me. I took the rifle silently and got into the truck. When Negan was in the driver's seat, I looked at him with a smirk on my lips.

"Let's shut this shit down," I said, repeating his words from earlier.

He nodded and smiled at me, leaning over and kissing me. I leaned my gun against the door and looked to where Lucille was leaning against Negan's leg. He grabbed my hand before turning the truck on and putting it in drive. As we headed out of the Sanctuary, Negan looked at me.

"I love you, doll. Don't do anything stupid."

"I won't. I love you."

We sat in silence for part of the ride, his fingers squeezing mine every once in a while. I looked at him, deciding whether or not I should ask the question that had been running through my mind. I took a deep breath.

"What did you do to Rosita?"

"Who?" he asked, sounding slightly confused.

"Rosita, the girl that tried to kill me."

"Oh. Simon shot her," he answered without looking at me.

"Oh. So she's dead?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Well he shot her in the head, so I fuckin' hope she's dead," he said sarcastically, no humor in his voice.

I knew he didn't want to think about what had happened last time we were in Alexandria, but I wanted to make sure she was dead. Because if Simon wouldn't have killed her, I would have made sure to finish the job. We continued the rest of the ride in silence until the walls of Alexandria came into view. I immediately felt my heartrate increase, feeling scared and excited at the same time. There were a few walkers near the gate, but they weren't a threat to us. Negan easily took them out with Lucille. When the gate opened, Rick was waiting for us on the other side.

"What do you want, Negan?" Rick asked, clearly not thrilled to see us.

"Just wanted to pay you a visit, Rick. Mind if we come inside?" Negan had a smile on his lips but I knew that he was pissed.

Rick moved to the side to allow the rest of the trucks to come into the gate. I followed Negan inside, keeping my hands tight on my gun. Rick looked at me and eyed the rifle in my hands.

"How are you feeling, Emma?" he asked, only sounding slightly concerned.

"Seriously? Fuck off, Rick," I glared, my voice barely above a whisper.

"That's my girl," Negan said, putting his arm around my waist. "She doesn't take shit from nobody, including you."

"Emma, Rosita acted alone. I had no idea that she would try anything like that. Come home. Please."

"Home?" I scoffed, "this place was never my home."

I looked at Negan and he leaned down and kissed my forehead. A small smile crept across my lips as I felt his hand subtly drift lower on my hip.

"Now Rick, let's talk about why we're here. A little birdy told me that you've come across some guns. And I mean a whole fuckin' lot of guns. Is this true?"

Rick's eyes widened a little bit before he regained complete composure.

"We may have found a few guns. But we only need them for safety purposes."

"Well then you wouldn't mind showing me these fuckin' guns, would you?

By this time, most of the people in Alexandria were standing out on the street. Michonne was next to Rick, a look of concern on her face.

"Rick," she said quietly.

He glanced at her for a moment and then sighed.

"Follow me, they're this way."

"That's what I fuckin' like to hear, Rick," Negan smiled, keeping his arm around my waist.

We followed Rick to the armory and I could feel the annoyance radiating off of Negan when there were only two guns.

"Rick. I know you're not trying to bullshit me. Because that would be a very fuckin' stupid thing to do. Where are the rest of your fucking guns?"

Rick and Negan walked across the room. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Michonne's arm move. When I saw the handgun in the band of her pants that she was reaching for, I aimed my rifle at her. I fired a shot, causing her to drop the gun and cry out in pain. Negan and Rick turned around and Rick ran to Michonne. He grabbed the gun and pointed it at me when I felt the air leave my chest. I fell to the ground and felt a foot on my back and a gun pointed at my head. I looked across the room at Negan and saw the fear and anger in his eyes.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

After a few seconds, I felt my eyes roll back in my head and my body began to convulse. While everyone was in shock at what was happening, Negan took advantage of the distraction and pulled out the gun he had hidden and fired it at whoever was standing on my back. One of his men knocked Rick out while Negan picked me up and ran to the truck. A few minutes later, I became more aware of what was going on. I looked around and then looked at Negan.

"I'm so sorry. I ruined everything," I cried, tears rolling down my cheeks.

"Hey. You saved my life back there. It's alright. Are you okay?"

"I'm alright, just a little shaken up. What are we gonna do now?" I asked, my accent thicker.

"I'm going to go in there and kick Rick's ass. You wait here. Simon is outside guarding the truck. You'll be alright." He leaned over and kissed my forehead.

I took a shaky breath as Negan left the truck. Several minutes later, I heard a gunshot. I began to panic, not knowing if it had been Negan that had been shot. After a while, I saw Negan walking down the street toward the truck, swinging Lucille. I saw that the bat was covered in blood and began to cry. It was over. It was finally all over. Negan climbed into the truck, setting Lucille between his legs. He looked over and saw the tears streaming down my face.

"What's wrong, doll? Everything's okay," he said brushing some hair away from my face.

"Who got shot?" I asked between shaking breaths.

"Carl. Little fucker tried to pull a gun on me, even after seeing what happened to Michonne."

"I thought it was you. I thought you were dead. I'm sorry," I began to cry even harder, thinking about what would've happened if Negan had been killed.

"Hey, look at me. You see this?" he motioned to Lucille, "we won. We will always win. I'm not going anywhere and I won't let anything happen to you. I promise."

He wiped the tears from my face and leaned over to kiss me gently. When he pulled away, he reached for my hand, rubbing his thumb across my hand.

"Let's go home, doll."


End file.
